Jun 15, 2011


My never-ending disgust for lazy people, video games, and reality TV has finally overflowed and become a flood of positive energy. It looks like me, Woody, and a few other key figures are going to jump into the SoCal High School Mountain Bike League pool and start a team for the Redlands area. First instinct is to call the team “No More Fat Kids,” but something like “Redlands SoCal MTB” would probably be more appropriate. We’d go with just plain “Team Redlands,” however some other rinky dink organization has already taken the name. They must be the entity that works with the Redlands Department of Tourism, or something. Who the heck knows.

Anyway, the official season for high school mountain biking runs from December to May, so if you’re interested in helping with weekly training rides during those months, drop me a line. Don’t send me an email telling me you want to help, and then drop off the face of the earth when January rolls around because the new season of Survivor or American Idol is in full swing. We’re looking for serious applicants only with a zest for bike life, a disturbing sick hatred for obesity and diabetes, and a strong back.

Aut vincere aut mori
That’s Latin for, “Either to conquer or to die.” In other words, this is going to be fantastic.


Anonymous said...

Diabetes isn't always caused by poor diet and lack of exercise. Type 1 diabetes isn't the result of poor life choices and cannot be cured. No matter how hard you ride a bicycle.

Jeff said...

As long as it doesn't conflict with the Apprentice you can count on help from me.

Nate said...

Dig the 'Rushmore' poster

Dad, Writer, Pro Mountain Biker. said...

Thank you Dr. Anonymous.

Steve said...

Saw the poster announcing your plans to start the group. Good luck and good job in working to get kids moving and enjoying the outdoors.