Salad Days

UPDATE: I had the best intentions to publicly ridicule myself with a flavorful explanation of this classic photo, but the mail person brought me a new Velo News, Cycle News and my first pay check in weeks, so there is celebrating to be done. Use your imagination regarding the photo; I was 18, it was the '90s, the fanny pack doubled as a camera bag and sunglass leashes were (and still are) functional.

Like you never wore white tube socks...

A Gallery of Unemployment

Ryder & I went out to crit last night, because that's just what we do and the little wheel sucker loves it.

Back at Snowmass, I close my eyes and cross my fingers hoping that I get a call-up sooner than 77th. No such luck. On the far right Sager looks thrilled to have had his suspension lifted.

Southern Californians invaded Colorado. I'm not sure what Joy has hanging from her neck. It's a foreign object I've not seen recently.

Here's one for you: In Colorado trails run through streams and the streams have water in them.

There are also sharp objects in the streams. In my college speech class, I did a demonstrative speech on how to change a mtb tube. I think I got a B+ instead of an A on the account that I acted nervous because people were watching me. Deja vu.

Back at crit: Ryder does his best Al Bundy. Meanwhile, I've been riding so much lately that I've been reduced to wearing old bibs and jerseys. I need to find some time to do laundry.

Joy brought Dozer out to crit. I thought it was cool and all until Ryder came down with kennel cough later that night. I think Kramer had that once too.

Here's another one for you: In Colorado the plants and trees are green.

I've seen less holes in a screen door.

The Effects of Unemployment

On the positive side, this could bode well for Everest Challenge.

Ryder Started Pre-School Yesterday

This poor kid has been duped. Little did he know that moments after this photo was taken his parents would abandon him and leave him with total strangers.

I made the trip to Snowmass, CO for the NMBS Finale because, why not, I don't have a job. The hardest part was leaving Ryder for that many days and it got even harder when the poor dude came down with the flu on Wednesday and I wasn't there for him. I owe Denise big time for that one, for sure. By Friday evening Ryder was eatting Grandma Cindy's tacos like it was the last supper and I was able to start Saturday's race with a somewhat clear head.

I got called up 77th (second to last). It was great. Just me and some other poor guy sitting 10 feet behind a huge field waiting for Larry Longo to give us props. The situation got worse because the first 20 minutes of the race was single-track climbing with no passing. We raced it slower than we pre-rode it. Gaps galore, but what can you do?

I rode much of the race with some of the series regulars (even the ones that live at altitude), so that was nice in a painful kind of way. At one point I was running inside the 50s, but brain faded, missed a left hander and had to double back. I tried to catch and pass those who got by me, but at 10,000 feet it ain't easy. Instead I blew and finished 58th. Not great, but not bad for my third race on a geared bike all year and at a Nat'l at altitude.

The next afternoon I came down with a soar throat and ear ache, which didn't help Saturday's effort much, but what can you do? That's my story.

An actual race only lasts a few hours, but the time spent at the race lasts for days. As usual I got the chance to pre-ride and hang out with a lot of cool people. Joy's family took care of our condo, food and all the racers in our circle, which was way cool of them. They also did my feed, under less-than-stellar conditions. A big thanks for that. I rode a ton with her brother Jeremy, who lives in the Boulder area, and with the PossAbilities gang. Did some feeding with the Backbone Boys (thanks for the fleece James) and got hooked up with the hot Bontrager tubeless tire set-up (after an unfortunate pre-ride flat) from Jon Rourke and the factory Subaru Gary Fisher Team. I won't, but I could sit here for hours and talk about Adam Hart's stories, the drive, Joy's Nat'l Championship, the riding & my race. Like you don't even know.

Jeremy, Adam & Eric pretend they don't know I'm taking a photo with my crappy camera.

This was as flat as it got. Everything else was either straight up or straight down. And rocky.

This is how they roll in the Aspen area. A bike wash and with towels to boot.

Just when I thought I was out, they keep pulling me back in.

Gimme Gimme Me Shock Treatment

I was feeling sick I was loosing my mind
I heard about these treatments
From a good friend of mine he was always happy smile on his face
He said he had a great time at the place

Peace and love is here to stay and now I can wake up and face the day Happy happy happy all the time shock treatment, I'm doing fine

Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment I wanna, wanna shock treatment

I was feeling sick I was loosing my mind I heard about these treatments From a good friend of mine he was always happy smile on his face He said he had a great time at the place

Peace and love is here to stay and now I can wake up and face the day Happy happy happy all the time shock treatment, I'm doing fine

Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment Gimme gimme shock treatment I wanna, wanna shock treatment

I'm Mr. Mom now. K&N gave me the shaft last week (because I knew too much) and so I get to spend some time towing Ryder around and taking him to his classes at My Gym. Rad. I sure will miss him when I'm in Snowmass.

Not sure what I'll do for work next. I have a month or two before the well runs totatly dry, but hopefully it won't get to that point. I just need a little time to decompress before I jump into the job search. It definately came as a shock...

Get To Know Brett Kinsfather

Freemanrace: What was your first impression of me?
Brett Kinsfather: What's with the gallon jug of water?

What is your impression of me today? Where's the gallon jug of water?

Brett Favre: Great or Greatest? Great quarterback, greater pain killer addict.

If I gave you 200 bucks to go buy a gift, what would you buy me?
I'd bribe someone to give you a better job.

If I gave you 50 bucks to buy yourself a gift, what would you buy?
Contacts...I'm f’ing through with glasses.

I hear bad habits are hard to break. Are there any bad habits you’d like to break? My bad habit of continually ripping on the same people.

Courtney Love: Victim or Misunderstood? At one point in time, she had a great rack.

What do you think of my Nuns Having Fun calendar and does it offend you? An office cubicle must.

I consider myself superior to the average Joe because I ride bikes. Why don’t you ride bikes? I consider someone who can kill another man with their bare hands superior to anyone who rides a bike.

What do you think my first impression of you was? Where the effe did this guy come from and where is his gallon jug of water?

What do you think my impression of you today is? One of the few people who understand Matt's love/hate relationship with all living creatures.

Do you have any parting words? I heard two Louie Bono stories recently. The first one was that he has spent some time in a mental facility. The second one was my friend overhearing this come out of Louie's mouth to a girl at a recent wedding: "Hey, you know I have a room at the hotel for after the reception...I'm in room D, Big D." He then proceeded to laugh hysterically to himself.

- Brett Kinsfather is an internet minister currently residing in Illinois. He spends his time building hot rods, looking for employment and compiling stories for an upcoming biography about his childhood friend, Louie Bono, who’s the dumbest man alive. Brett’s only regret in life is that he’ll never get back the time spent waiting for Bill Crites to finish eating the many dinners they shared together.

Tossers Tuesday

Actually, every tuesday is Tossers Tuesday in my book, but yesterday was a True Tossers Tuesday. We saw them at the Galaxy Theatre. I forgot what a shithole that place was, but I digress. The opening bands were horrible, the Street Dogs were so-so and The Tossers were freaking awesome. Joey and I chatted up Tony Duggins, the singer, on our way out the door. He was completely pissed (that means drunk), but very talkative.

Right now I'm not very talkative. I think I'll go ride my bike...